A Carpentar named Joseph.

A long time ago, there lived a man named Joseph. Joseph was a carpentar. He was engaged to be married to a young lady named Mary, a women whom he was very much in love with. In fact, they were both very much in love and were set on marrying one another.

But before they could get married, Josepg found out that Mary was pregnant. And because he was an honorable man, he was determined to end his engagement with Mary.

Before he could do so, an unearthly being named Gabriel came and told him to not do what he was thinking of doing, but rather, to continue with his plans of marrying Mary. Because Joseph was also God-fearing, he did what he was told and took Mary as his wife.

When Mary was nearing her time to give birth, Josepg took her to his original homwtown of Bethleham because it was required that all man go and register themselves with the ruling government at his own hometown.

Because of this, and the lateness of the hour, Joseph could not find a proper place to put up for the night and had to accept the offer of a shepherd to take refuge in a barn.

Mar, out of exhaustion from the journey, went into labour that night. Amazingly too, three total strangers, all of whome were well-to-do business entrepreanurs from nations far away, stopped by at the barn and congratulated Mary and Joseph on the birth of their beautiful baby boy.

Josepg decided to name the baby, Jesus, who turned into a fine carpentar like his father Joseph. And who, at about 33 years of age, died on a cross for the sake of mankind.

Christmas blessings and a new year filled with joy, happiness and good health for all!

Introduction to My Office

The Entryway to My Office

My desk faces the door from a 45degree angle. Best of all, I am 'shield' by my cpu and my monitor so whoever enters the office will not know if I am at my desk unless I make it known. Hee hee heee....



My Unusually Cluttered Desk...

My desk is unusually cluttered when I took the picture because I just got back from organising a function thus the paper bag (which I used to carry our door-gifts), the digital camera cable etc etc. But really, on any given day, not a file is out of place.



My Blinds..with its seasonal decor...

I draw my window's blinds because the grills on it are horrendous!!!! So I am slowly decorating my bland pale blue blinds with nice pictures... but no, you will not find personal pictures on it.



My Teeney Notice Board....

I have a ridiculously tiny notice board. On it are contact nos. of my Board of Directors, staff e-mail addresses as well as an article from Musings (The Star) written by Datuk Paduka Marina Mahathir (my former Boss, AIDS Council President).



My Paper Christmas Tree

This tree sits atop my cpu so it further help shiled me from outside view. Sitting at my desk, working on the computer, this the the exact angle I get of my tree albeit from a lower perspective.



My Paper Angel....

I made paper-cone angels for myself, my clerk and my designer in conjunction with the Christmas season. My manager does not have one cos.... I dunno. I only give to those I like...KAH KAH KAH



The Tree in my Office

This tree was 'sponsored' by my manager. Though she is a Buddhist, she was more excited than I was due to the season and brought a tree to decorated the office....hmmmm....



My Plant

For good feng shui, I have a water plant on my desk...see how much it grows...BTW, please don't tell the gardener that I snipped these off his plants...hee hee

Working at the Beach

I was at the beach the last three days, not for a well-earned vacation but rather to rapporteur for a workshop.

Man!!! It sure is lonely being at the seaside resort when you are working and all alone. I missed my kids and hubby.

I was confined in an air-conditioned room 8am to 10pm. I was stuck with a bunch of people who was talking non-stop about the workshop or what they will discuss further. I had to wear office-wear! at the resort.

Mann!!! I need a vacation.

So I will be submitting my leave application form today. It is about time anyway.

Happy holidays to those who are already in it! And go have one, to those who are thinking of it.

Cheers!

In search of ‘old’ friends…

There are friends and then, there are, friends.

I have some friends with whom I have lost touch and really, really would like to re-connect with.

First and foremost, there is Scott Lamura. Scott was my first pen-pal – someone whom I got to know and love dearly (as a friend) when I was just 10 years old. He is an American. Although we have never met but we talked on the telephone once – when he called me from the US to give his birthday wishes for my twelve birthday. We kind of lost touch when we turned 18 – each of us leaving our homes for college and being caught up with our own lives. Then amazingly enough, he wrote me when we turned 21 – he was then a steward with American Airlines and was living in Chicago. Somehow or rather, he remembered me and wrote. Then there were silence. When I got engaged and my wedding approaches, I made an attempt to get in touch of him and managed to track his mom; I wrote her, telling her about myself and my (then) pending wedding. Surprisingly, Scott wrote back! And of all things (and something which somehow breaks my heart), he informed that only a year before, he and his mom had came to Malaysia for a holiday. He had remembered me but had no idea how to get hold of me. Our paths, somehow, is not destined to cross… He is silence once again and being a steward, he moves around a lot so I am just not sure how to get hold of him now.

Another friend is Nurul Hanum Abdul Rafar. She was my best bud in college. We were like sisters…always hanging out together. But somehow, in the third semester, we drifted apart – I met my (then) boyfriend (now hubby) and she had met her partner. The last time I heard from her was in 1999 when she was still working with PJ Hilton, expecting her first child and living at Puchong Kiara. How can I track her now?

These two people really meant a lot to me – Scott for being the first boy who was such a fun friend and at a time when we do not see the other person as a person of different sex but more as a friend and bud. And Nurul because she was like a sister and a friend and so much fun but also very competitive and encouraging at the same time.

If given the chance now, I would like to tell these two that I really love them and that I really appreciate their friendship.

A Conversation with a Four Year-Old a.k.a. Why? Because... I dunno!

On the way to the shopping mall.

Child: Where are we going mom?

Mom: To the shopping mall.

Child: To shop?

Mom: Yes.

Child: What are we buying?

Mom: Nothing in particular. Just window-shopping, I guess.

Child: Okay....

After a moments pause....

Child: Why do we window-shop?

Mom: Becos it is nice... we can compare prices. Then when we need the stuff, we know where to go get it and how much it will cost. Don't you like window-shopping?

Child: It's okay.

Child shrugs.

Mom: What do you mean... it's ok?

Child: Because...

Mom looks at child questioningly.

Child: I dunno!

Christmas Will Soon Be Upon Us...

Malaysia just concluded its Hari Raya Aidil Fitri holidays. We were on a 3 days break and only just came back to work today, Wednesday, 17 November. However, many of us, especially the Moslems, are still on holiday. It is evident through the lack of vehicles on the road.

Soon, in 5 weeks time to be exact, the entire world will be celebrating Christmas. And I mean the entire world because Christmas is seen as the culmination of all holidays. Everyone is more laid-back and things tend to tone down; work, activities, projects etc.

Have I done my christmas shopping? I should although I have not done any. I have seen the things I could make and give as christmas gifts but... (sigh!) do I really want to do it now?

I dunno.

What do my family want? I have bought something for hubby. I can wrap that up and make it his gift but knowing myself, I probably will get him something else when I see that something else.

Ash? Emma? Maybe a toy. Ash seems to like BArbie dolls now. So maybe it is time that she gets her first Barbie. Emma?... She will be one on Christmas Dayitself so what do you give a child who shares the same 'birthday' with The Lord???? And do we double the gift....???

Siblings?....My sister from Miri is coming back for Christmas so that means 2 additional gift this year - one for herself and another for her son.

And who will give me gifts> Hubby? I bet you my bottom dollar that he won't. That is part of his tradition... he just don't give gifts.

So once again, I ponder.

Christmas will soon be upon us. And in the true sense of how I work...I need to get the approval of my GM for my advance leave first.

Then, only then, will i think about buying gifts.

Have a fruitful year-end.

Writing is a Skill

Write

Part of my work, or most of my work, requires me to write.

I write releases, notes, meeting minutes, draft for the newsletter and magazines, write short notes to my supervisors etc. But I have also known for a long time that I like to write creatively.

When Ash was born, I would like a short journal telling her of my daily routines, its incidences, the latest news. I continued doing this till after Emma was born. Then I stopped. For no other reason other than that I cannot find the time to sit in front of the pc and write.

However, i have this blog and I find that not only can I write my thoughts and feelings, I can share it with others.

So forgive me if I sound crude sometimes.

At least I write. Do you?

Ash's First Concert

She can sing really loudly...

Ashleigh had her first concert on SUnday, 7 November 2004. She performed a few pieces for the opening and closing of the concert where she sang a malay, chinese and english song.

She looked really charming and adorable in her maroon dress, sitting at the front row and singing her heart out.


She smiles when she saw her daddy...

How to Look Like the Hardest Working Employee in The Office

1. Never walk down the hall without a document in your hands. People with documents in their hands look like hardworking employees heading for important meetings. People with nothing in their hands look like they're heading for the cafeteria. People with a newspaper in their hand look like they're heading for the toilet. Above all, make sure you carry loads of stuff home with you at night, thus generating the false impression that you work longer hours than you do.

2. Use computers to look busy. Any time you use a computer, it looks like "work" to the casual observer. You can send and receive personal e-mail, calculate your finances and generally have a blast without doing anything remotely related to work. These aren't exactly the societal benefits that the proponents of the computer revolution would like to talk about, but they're not bad either. When you get caught by your boss -and you will get caught - your best defense is to claim you're teaching yourself to use new software, thus saving valuable training dollars.

3. Messy desk. Top management can get away with a clean desk. For the rest of us, it looks like you're not working hard enough. Build huge piles of documents around your workspace. If you know somebody is coming to your cubicle, bury the document you'll need halfway down in an existing stack and rummage for it when he/she arrives.

4. Voice Mail. Never answer your phone if you have voice mail. People don't call you just because they want to give you something for nothing - they call because they want YOU to do work for THEM.

5. Looking Impatient and Annoyed. According to George Costanza, one should also always try to look impatient and annoyed to give your bosses the impression that you are always busy.

6. Appear to Work Late. Always leave the office late, especially when the boss is still around. You could read magazines and storybooks that you always wanted to read but have no time until late before leaving. Make sure you walk past the boss' room on your way out. Send important emails at unearthly hours (e.g. 9:35pm, 7:05am, etc...) and during public holidays.

7. Creative Sighing for Effect. Sigh loudly when there are many people around, giving the impression that you are very hard pressed.

8. Stacking Strategy. It is not enough to pile lots of documents on the table. Put lots of books on the floor etc. . . . You can always borrow from the library. Thick computer manuals are the best.

9. Build Vocabulary. Read up on some computer magazines and pick out all the jargon and new products. Use it freely when in conversation with bosses. Remember: They don't have to understand what you say, but you sure sound impressive.

10. MOST IMPORTANTLY: DON'T forward this to your boss by mistake!!!

Train of Thoughts - wednesday, 27 October 2004

We had a meeting with the Admin Dept today - to brainstorm, sort of, on that Dept publicity and marketing needs. However, I came out of the meeting with the feeling that it was a poor meeting - most of the talking was done by my GM and Asst Manager. The Admin reps just sat there and nodded their agreement to whatever was being said.

When I got back to my desk, I saw the tonnes of work that awaits me. So I am starting off with Internal-Link, the in-house magazine for the oragnisation.

In 10-minutes flat, I came up with the draft for the article on "Punch Card" and I am waorking on a draft for our recently concluded media workshop. Then, I got writer's block... thus this train of thoughts. Maybe it can help unblock the block....what an oxymoron!!!

My clerk's pc is annoying me. She has the speaker on and everytime she does a mistake, it goes 'bloope', 'bloope'. I dpn't know whatchacallit but it gives off that sound to let you know that a mistake has been made. I gave her the dirty look a few times but she is ignorant.

Speakof ignorant, a lot of my colleagues are. Cultural, racially, religiously.

Ha!!! Ha!!! ha!!! I am being so Up and Mighty but really... I found that, in the last 2years I have been back in this city, many of the city's citizen are ignorant in many ways. I concluded that it is probably because (i) they have not experienced a more racially, culturally and religiously mized society, (ii) they are not learned enough (iii) they think they know all already.

Sp there...

Now my Asst Manager is briefing a colleague on something in her mind. More work for us.

Here's what in my mind now...what shall I have for lunch?

Simplified Sign Language

The Sign for 'Sad'

I am teaching Emma to use sign language.

I am not trained at using sign language but I can try, and I am doing my research on it. Did you know that sign languages is divided into British and American? Odd, don't you think. It is like spelling 'organisation' in 2 ways - with an 's' or, with a 'z'.

But anyway, Emma knows the sign for 'milk' already. She looked at my hand when I sign it to her so it is embedded in her memory bank somehow. Basically, sign language for babies is simplified and for basic words such as 'milk', 'sleepy', 'bath' etc. I am also teaching Ash sign and the first few words are 'mommy', 'daddy' and 'sister'.

So yeah. She can talk (she mumbles now), can hear (I know cos she response to our voices) so why not let her sign too!

My Baby's A Big Girl Now...

I made these banner myself...

Ashleigh turned 4 yesterday, October 17 2004.

We had a small birthday do at home and invited her aunt, uncle, a cousin and her grandparents (my parents). She was so excited since morning because I was putting together her birthday banner. Then had her father blow the balloons to decorate the house.

When evening came, my family came and she was more excited, running around and being busy setting the table. She almost fainted when she saw the birthday cake her aunt made her.

Everyone had a good feast on the food which included curry crabs, buttered prawns, mixed vegetables and BBQ chicken wings.

Even Emma was excited and couldn't go to sleep because of all the people there, although she was sleepy and was rubbing her eyes red.


Ash's cake made by her aunt

I Shopped Like Never Before....

I shopped during lunch today. Although many of us would officially recognise this as being the 'middle' of the month, the time when our finances are dwindling, when we start to tighten our purse-strings etc etc. However, I shopped and spent nearly RM250/-. Not much of a figure but! considering that it is the middle of the month and that I hardly spend any money on myself, that is a first....

So, what did I buy?

Two cute little dresses for Emma and a pair of hair clips for Ashleigh. Of course I bougt stuff for the girls; I always do!. It sort of make me not feel guilty about spending the money... But really! I always make sure I buy stuff for the girls... even if I do not have stuff for myself. For myself, I bought a white long sleeve blouse for work and a black pant-suit - clothes I have always wanted. AND... I bought a Crocodile-brand wrist watch to replace my (sob! sob!) Swatch Irony wrist watch which died out on me ages ago.

BTW...anyone for a none-working Swatch Irony watch? It will cost you just RM150/-. And if you live in/around KL, better still. You can bring it to Low Yat Plaza and get it fixed at the Swatch shop there. It will just cost you RM50/- to get it fixed. And I can guarantee that it is fixable... I can do it but I do not have the time to spare for the fixture (it will take at least 2-weeks....).

So yeah... I finally bought myself a watch. It is cool... rather dressy but conservative enough for work and play.

So there... that's my equivalent of a shopping spree. My next spree? Probably in early December...for Christmas.

Guardian Angels are a Child's Best Friend

Emma is hospitalised again. Please pray with us for her speedy recovery.

Thank you.

Elizabeth Ashleigh

Ash loves to be photographed...


One of her many poses...


She writes...!.. at least when she feels like it.


She adores her baby sister...

Emma - Noelle Caitlin

Emma's Favorite Toy is Little Bert of Sesame Street


Big sisters are meant to be bullied....


Rather than suck at her thumb, she sucks her right lower arm...


My Baby loves to blow bubbles with her saliva...


Every Child Should Have a Picture Taken Like This...

With Kids Comes Responsibilities...

Chicken Pox

My children are ill... the eldest have the chickenpox and the baby have the flu.

About chickenpox and my child... for other kids, they would be lying around, sickly and groaning in pain with blisters all over. but for Ash, she has the blisters all right, but fever? Nooooo......! In fact, she is actually jumping around and showing off her spots to everyone who cares to have a look. She does not have the fever and her spots are small blisters. However, today is the fourth day she is having it and they are still appearing. Hopefully, they will subside by next Monday.

Emma have the fever. We do not know if this is her reaction towards the 'pox or because it has been a while since she was last ill. But her fever is bad...I spent most nights awake trying to comfort her and helping her loosen her mucus. Yesterday, a colleague commented that I look tired.... hmmmm... well, with kids comes responsibilities. And it is even more obvious when you are the mother. Ask any woman who is a mother and she will tell you that not only is she a worker, she is also the mother, the wife and the caregiver.

I can feel an illness coming from lack of sleep and fatigue. In terms of work, it has been hectic the last few days 'cos was finalising the retreat for my officers. Now, at least I can take a deep breath. The office is finally quiet and I can slow down.

My shoulder aches....

There are dark circles under my eyes...

My eyes hurts from lack of sleep....

Help! I need a retreat myself....!

My Little Sleepyhead

Did I mentioned that Ashleigh attends a kindy near my office? This is her in her school uniform. She is such a sleepyhead that she only opens her eyes to take her bath and puts on her uniform. Then she is off to dream land until it is time for us to leave the house.

Next year she is 5 - another year of kindy-land then we have to decide where to send her for her first grade classes.

Decisions, decisions, decisions.

A Rare Moment

Emma hardly smiles or laugh so it was a rare moment when she actually laughed at the camera. Even then it was from much teasing from her sister.

Methinks this child of mine is the serious, thoughtful kind.

A Creative Eye....

Do You See The Lion's Head?

My colleague took this picture on the first night we were at Uma Lahanan. It was amazing!

At first glance, it is just a bunch of clouds. Under close scrutiny, can you see the lion's head?

I Survived Sg Asap

Sg Asap, Uma Lahanan and the whole Lahanan community was something to experience.

In short, the trip was successful, I am tired, the food was good and plentiful, the activities was hectic and the people friendly.

What more can I say?

I Have To Go...Again

I am going travelling again. This time, not to a metropolitan setting such as KL but rather, to the interiors of Sarawak. I am going to Uma Lahanan in the sub-District of Sg Asap, Belaga.

I wish I didn't have to go because I hate the idea of leaving the kids. But I have to. Why? Because I want to make this the one time so that I can get it done and over with; so that my Boss will not pick me to go for the other trips till maybe... in 6 months time. Because I have just too many stuff to do in the office!!!

I will be flying into Bintulu on 22 Sept. From there, we will take a four-wheel drive to Uma Lahanan, which by the way, is nearly 2-hours drive away. We could take the boat, which takes about an hour but with this rainy season, we do not want to be part of Sarawak's river mishap statistics.

To top it all off, Uma Lahanan does not have a Hilton. Rather, we will be spending the 4 nights there in Uma Lahanan itself, which is the name of the longhouse.

That area, mind you, is the Orang Ulu area so thank goodness. Why? Because if it was an Iban area...hmmmm....

So wish me luck and an enjoyable stay. No electricity, no proper cooking place, no piping....(horrorsss...) at least that is what I was told.

Scare tactics?

Thank Your Lucky Stars...

If it was this guy, Hubby would be RM300 poorer...

On the way to work today, Simon (the Hubby) was stopped by a police sgt. bcos he was talking on his mobile phone while driving. I was so PISSED! (with Simon) bcos a million times i have told him to use the ear-piece (that little piece of gadget is hanging from the rear-view mirror in the car!) He got a good lecture from the guy - and nearly caused a traffic jam along the road where we were, since he had to stop at the road side and it was a narrow road. Thank his lucky stars, the Sgt let him off with a stern warning. The only thing I said to him when we drove away was "There is a reason why this thing is here," as I pointed to the ear-piece.

One annoying thing about my husband is that he is the 'curing' person, not the 'preventing' person - from the saying ' prevention is better than cure'. sometimes he would drive like shit and when i remark about it, he would say ' he knock us, he pay lah'. And i never failt o tell him, "I have no time and energy to spend on stopping the car, arguing with the next driver, reaching a settlement and getting the car fix." I even told him that if that should happen, I would just grab the kids and myself and be on our way, leaving him to settle the problem. I will not waste my time and energy on solving things that can be prevented.

Do You Remember When...

The Tower then

Today is September 13. Two days ago was the third anniversary of 9/11. Do you remember what you were doing when you first heard the news?

I do.

It was in the morning (of course). I had just dropped my husband off at his office and was making my way towards Jalan Sultan Ismail from Jalan Raja Chulan. The whole way from home, I had remarked to my husband that The Monring Crew (who then comprised of Lil' Kev and Fly Guy) of Hitz.Fm were not very funky today -- their selection of songs were not too 'happy' and neither one of them were very 'chatty' (for reasons that was still unknown to me).

As I stopped at the traffic light in front of the Wisma Genting, the voice of Lil' kev came on air and he announced the attacks on the Twin Towers.

At that moment, my heart stopped. I could see from the corner of my eyes that somehow, everything seems to go on slow-mo.

The cars were movving more slowly, the lady crossing in front of my car wa walking more slowly, more lethargically. Even I felt tired suddenly.

And all the way to my (former) office in Sentul, I thought and prayed to all involved -- rescuers, 'doers', families and loved ones.

I have a postcard of NY City with similar view of the towers as the picture above. How ironic. Maybe someday, this postcard will be worth a million bucks?

Changes to Come...

My office is going through a corporate change. We have hired some consultants to help us identify our weaknesses and strength as well as what needs to be done. We are all gung-ho for it.

However...

My Big Boss does not seem to want that change. At least, not the ones that the consultants are expecting to recommend. My GM is but not the Bog Boss.

Hmmm... so how do we expect to change when we can't change?

What Is In A Name...

My Daughters, Elizabeth Ashleigh and Emma-Noelle Caitlin

And what their names means….

ELIZABETH: ELIZABETH (f) "oath of God" (Hebrew). In the Old Testament this was the name of the wife of Aaron. In the New Testament this was the mother of John the Baptist. ELISABETH (f) Variant of ELIZABETH. ELISE (f) Short form of ELIZABETH. ELISSA (f) Russian short form of ELIZABETH. BETH Short form of Elizabeth. LIZZY-Nickname for Elizabeth.
ASHLEIGH: (f) “ash tree cleaning” (Old English). A Surname which was originally derived from a place which means ‘ash tree cleaning’.

Elizabeth Ashleigh; My First Born

We call her Ashleigh though at times, I would call her 'Achee' or 'Ashalee' depending on whether I want to make it sound Chinese and Indian. My sister thinks the name sounds too independant and overbearing so she tends to call her Elizabeth. However, Ash does not remember herself being named Elizabeth so at times, she will not reply when called that name.

EMMA: Old German name meaning "entire; universal." Variant, Emmeline, exists. Diminutives include Em, Emmie, and Emmy
NOEL / NOELLE: French name meaning "Christmas." Variants include Noël, Noele, Noële, Noelle, and Noëlle.
CAITLIN: (f) Irish form of Cateline, the old French form of Katherine. Means “pure’, a derivation made by the Romans, changing their spelling from Katerina to Katharina.

Emma-Noelle Caitlin; My Christmas Gift

Emma, I consider her as my Christmas gift because she was born on Christmas morning. Unlike her loud and domineering sister, Emma is gentle and quiet. Although she is just 8-months old at this time, but I can see that she is calm, collected and rather thoughtful.

Candle of Hope

Lighted candles symbolises hope, faith and strength.

We held a prayer session for Emma last saturday. Since she was born, she has been falling sick on and off, she finds it difficult to clear her nose of mucus and she was losing weight.

Hubby and I decided to have the session to seek the Creator's intervention in terms of her health.

I Am Getting Another Assistant...HAR HAR HAR!!!

I got news today that I will be getting an assistant to help me with the administrative duties that I have been doing.

So that means...

someone who can do the faxing for me...

someone who can answer my calls when I am away...

someone who can do the filing for me...

and most importantly...

someone I can share my grievances with when I feel over-loaded with stuffs.

Yahooo...!!!

p/s
I said 'another' assistant because I now have an assistant who specifically do the layout and design of this unit's publication. :-)

Like Chicken Without Head

I am exhausted because it is a friday and I am finally letting myself relax.

Since coming back from KL, I have had to organised 03(!!!) press conference just days within each other.

On Sunday, 15 August, I organised an MoU and Press Conference (PC) between my office and RTM for our radio show. For goodness sake! it's a sunday! Lemme sleep!!!!!

Tuesday, I coordinated a Sponsorship/grant Presentation from the US Embassy to my office. It was so last minute and with the sudden anthrax scare at the Embassy on Monday, 16 Aug, we thought this event won't materialised.

This mornng, I had to oversee a sponsorship cheque presentation from PETRONAS to mu office. It was ok... not many media rep though since they were all heading to the other function room where a BIGGER FISH (the Deputy Chief Minister) were to witness an MoU. However, the food was good so I made sure I had my time and energy worth it.

So now, I am slowly letting go. No, not of my brain but letting go of the fact that I can finally relax and not have to run around like a chicken without head.

Speeches anyone?....

The Ten Commandments for Parents of Handicapped Children

1. Take one day at a time, and take that day positively. You don't have control over the future, but you do have control over today.

2. Never underestimate your child's potential. Allow him, encourage him, expect him to develop to the best of his abilities.

3. Find and allow positive mentors: parents and professionals who can share with you their experience, advice and support.

4. Provide and be involved with the most appropriate educational and learning environments for your child from infancy on.

5. Keep in mind the feelings and needs of your spouse and your other children. Remind them that this child does not get more of your love just because he gets more of your time.

6. Answer only to your conscience: then you'll be able to answer to your child. You need not justify your actions to your friends or the public.

7. Be honest with your feelings. You can't be a super-parent 24 hours a day.Allow yourself jealousy, anger, pity, frustration, and depression in small amounts whenever necessary.

8. Be kind to yourself. Don't focus continually on what needs to be done. Remember to look at what you have accomplished.

9. Stop and smell the roses. Take advantage of the fact that you have gained a special appreciation for the little miracles in life that others take for granted.

10. Keep and use a sense of humor. Cracking up with laughter can keep you from cracking up from stress.

-Author Unknown-

God Chooses a Mom for a Disabled Child by Erma Bombeck

Most women become mothers by accident, some by choice, a few by social pressures, and a couple by habit. This year, nearly 100,000 women will become mothers of handicapped children. Did you ever wonder how mothers of handicapped children are chosen ? Somehow, I visualize God hovering over Earth selecting his instruments for propagation with great care and deliberation. As he observes, he instructs his angels to make notes in a giant ledger.

"Armstrong, Beth; son; patron saint, Matthew."

"Forrester, Marjorie; daughter; patron saint, Cecelia."

"Rudledge, Carrie; twins; patron saint... give her Gerard. He's used to profanity."

Finally, he passes a name to an angel and smiles, "Give her a handicapped child."

The angel is curious. "Why this one, God ? She's so happy."

"Exactly," smiles God.

"Could I give a handicapped child a mother who does not know laughter ? That would be cruel."

"But has she patience ?" asks the angel.

"I don't want her to have too much patience or she will drown in a sea of self-pity and despair. Once the shock and resentment wears off, she'll handle it. I watched her today. She has that feeling of self and independance. She'll have to teach the child to live in her world and that's not going to be easy."

"But, Lord, I don't think she even believes in you."

God smiles. "No matter. I can fix that. This one is perfect. She has just enough selfishness."

The angel gasps, "Selfishness ? Is that a virtue ?"

God nods. "If she can't seperate herself from the child occasionally, she'll never survive. Yes, there is a woman I will bless with a child less then perfect. She doesn't realize it yet, but she is to be envied. She will never take for granted a 'spoken word.' She will never consider a 'step' ordinary. When her child says 'Momma' for the first time, she will be present at a miracle and know it ! When she describes a tree or a sunset to her blind child, she will see it as few people ever see my creations.

"I will permit her to see clearly the things I see --- ignorance, cruelty, prejudice --- and allow her to rise above them. She will never be alone. I will be at her side every minute of every day of her life because she is doing my work as surely as she is here by my side."

"And what about her patron saint ?" asks the angel, his pen poised in midair.

God smiles. " A mirror will suffice."

... I am Back!...

The pilot flew over the city (a first for all my flying days) so these were the first I saw.

I won't tell you about the official stuffs but rather, lemme tell you about the other interesting things.

The evening we arrived...

We reached KL at 5pm Tuesday evening. The ride was waiting for us so we all hopped on in and off we went! Clever driver (his name was Charlie) he took the KL-Nilai Highway and avoided the Puchong/Damansara traffic. It was a smooth ride and I felt very nostalgic when we passed by Bukit Jalil/Palace of the Golden Horses. Oh! how I miseed the traffic ... NOT! Reaching the city, he went into Jalan Tun Razak and diverted into Jalan Bukit Bintang. Man!!! Welcome to KL, so said the traffic jam. Which, mind you, is common in that area, during or after hours. My dinner was chicken rice at the Hailam Chicken Rice shop at the cornershop facing BB Plaza -- from a small, dinggy place, it has now turned into a posh little chicken rice cafe complete with uniformed waiters.

24-hours later....

I rushed back to my room, changed and took all my colleagues' ticket to get them endorsed. MAS office (almost 3 blocks down the road) was closing at 5.30pm so I hopped on the monorail (my first ride in it, yahooo!!!) and got there in time to get them endorsed. Then, I decided to walk back to the hotel. It was a nice walk anyway. The office traffic has not started and it was shady evening. There is the mamak restaurant that was in the news recently after it was vandalised by thugs/ccompetitors. There is the little 7-Eleven store I used to frequent when I was a trainee at Regent Hotel. There is Regent Hotel -- where i met my hubby. :-) There is Lot 10 and BB Plaza, and Sg Wang. That evening, i made my way to Sogo (on the monrail again!) and bought my hubby some work clothes. I also saw some very nice handbags but then...not in my list of things to buy.

Afternoon, 2nd day of trip...

I sat in a PICANTO!!! Coincidentally, NAZA KIA had a road show for its vehicles at The Mall where we had lunch and I saw my dream car!!!

Evening, 2nd day of trip...

I lost my friend in the mall so I made my own way, which was nicer since I get to see and do all the things that I want to. For dinner, I ordered out some croissant, talked to the waiter/server since he was alone and friendly and went back to the room. That night, I cried. Because I was tired. Because I want to go home and sleep in my own bed. Because I missed my family.

Evening, 3rd day of trip

I hated today. I nearly quarrelled with my officer and my CEO left for home the previous evening and everything and everyone suddenly seems to have a mind of their own and no one wants to follow itinerary. Worst, I am left standing at a taxi stand with a whole bunch of people with the same purpose and we are late for Brian's dinner. Simpy becasue my officer thinks it is best to take a cab then anything else. By the time we got to Bangsar Park, Brian was edgy, I was tired and his pasta was cold and there were only 5 of us compared to food for 9 people...

Saturday morning

I changed my flight ticket to saturday night insteasd of sunday night. i want to see the kids now if possible. I also did my shopping - taking my time and knowing that I know where and how much those things are.

Mona picked me up from the hotel room. It was good to see her but after a while, I wanted to go already so she dropped me off at KL Central.

I was so tired I napped in the train on the way to the airport. And I napped further in the airplane. By the time I got to Kuching, I was mentally and physically exhausted. Having my 4year old greet me at the airport arrival hall was a nice respite from all that I have gone through.

I am finally home.

Heaven's Very Special Child

A meeting was held far from earth
'It's time again for another birth'
said the angel to the Lord above
'This special child will need much love'.

Her progress may seem very slow
Accomplishments she may not show
And she'll require extra care
from the folk she meets way down there.

She may not run, or laugh, or play
her thoughts might seem quite far away
In many ways she won't adapt
And she will be known as handicapped.

So let's be careful where she's sent
We want her life to be content
Please Lord find the people who
Will be special for you.

They will not realise right away
The leading role they're asked to play
But with this child sent from above
Comes stronger faith and richer love.

And soon they'll know the privilege given
in caring for this gift from heaven
Their precious charge, so meek, so mild
Is 'Heaven's Very Special Child'.

...I have to go...

The first week of August will be a difficult time for me. For I have to leave my little baby, 4yr old and my hubby.

This will be the second time I am leaving my kids. The first was when my eldest daughter was hardly a year old. I left her and her father to attend a conference at Melbourne, Australia for nearly two weeks. Though I was excited and busy while at Melbourne, there were time when I recollect and remember them. Things I saw, I witnessed, I experienced, I wish I could share with them.

Now, from August 03 to 08, I will be away again. This time, leaving Ashleigh, my hubby Simon and my baby, Emma-Noelle. Though I will just be in Kuala Lumpur; a place that is so far yet so familiar, among familiar people/culture and way of life, but the thought of being away from my little precious makes me sad. As my previous departure from them, I am excited about this trip.

Having moved back to Kuching almost 2 1/2years ago, this will be my first trip back to the metropolitan city. I look forward to meeting my friends, my former colleagues, seeing the places I knew and some new ones etc. But still, there will be some nights when things/events/smell/incidents which will definitely remind me of them and makes me wonder how they are, what they are doing, how they are coping with my absence.

Many reasons make me hope that I do not have to go but this fact really dawned on me when I held the flight ticket in my name, in my hands. Deep inside me, I know I have to go. Not only because it is my professional requirements, but also because I need and deserve to go away, even for a short while.

I just hope some day, Ash and Emma will remember, and understand.

PICANTO! PICANTO! - 2

Today I came across another blogger who had booked her PICANTO and actually seen one!

I asked her a few things about the car but what really amaze me was that she told me that she had been waiting for her car since Janaury! Yeow.....!!!! DOes it really take that long to be delivered? Maybe I should just get a Kenari or ATOS?...?

But really, why so long the waiting period? And Why do car dealers advertised something that takes so long to be delivered? Why can it be more like a fast food joint....U saw, U Ordered, U Get. DONE!

The other morning I THOUGHT I saw a PICANTO on the road. Although I did not see it squarely but it sure looks like it...metalic apple green, same built, same backlights. Hmmm...if I was driving that morning, I would have turned and gone after the car just for the heck of it...heee heee heee.

Wanna know a secret?

Hubby don't know of this yet...

HAHH!!!! Man!

Nasty Thing call Medicine

this reminds me of how unhappy my baby was when it comes to medicine-eating

Last week, my 6months old baby was admitted into the hospital for having stridor (for information on the illness, go here: http://pedclerk.bsd.uchicago.edu/stridor.html). As required, I spent the 2-nights observation period with her in the hospital.

When her pediatric confirmed that she had stridor and that she needed to be admitted for observation, I could feel the tears welling my eyes. My tiny baby has to be hospitalized! In fact, I cried when I called my sister to let her know of the situation. I just couldn't help myself. And why not? She is so tiny and so young and so helpless.

So, we spent 2 nights there.

It was almost funny that the hospital required her to change into the oversized hospital gown. And I had to share the same (hospital) bed with her; we had to pull up the railings on one side so that I can put a pillow against it to avoid her tiny body going through it and falling to the floor. Me. I had a small sleeping space for myself.

Before that, the doctor inserted an IV into her right upper-hand. Where the nurse proceed to wrap it with a bandage and taped it up to avoid her pulling at it or even have it move an inch. This IV is used to inject the steroid and Antibiotics into her every 10hours. On top of that, she had to be nebulised every 8-10hours. She can sleep through the injections because they are relatively painless due to the use of the IV but the nebulizer… she lets the whole ward nurses knows that she utterly hate it by crying her lungs out!

Funnily enough, my baby was the cutest patient at the ward during that time. The nurses found her cute because also 'sick' as she was, she was still active and ever insistence on turning to her tummy whenever possible. And she still feeds well.

Her sister was another story.

She simply insists to be with us and was not happy that she had to attend kindy in the mornings during our hospital stay. In fact, my husband told me that she cried most mornings when she had to go to school. My heart goes out to her too and I realized that she is just like me; compassionate and emotionally attached to family members. To remedy this, my husband took leave during that time so he would be available to pick her up in the afternoons and drive her to the hospital to be with us. Also, it was to give me an opportunity to take a break from caring for the baby - at least get a breather by going to the garden or cafeteria.

I was glad when her pediatric announced that she has recovered well enough to be discharged. Although she had 3 medicines she had to take orally, but I was glad to be taking her home. Of course I know now, it would be much more 'painful' to administer the medicines to her (struggling, crying etc etc) but at least… she is home with us.

Some day, I will definitely let her know of our 2 nights 'hospital holiday'.

Those Were the Days… (part 1)

Sultan Abdul Samad Building aka the train station 

Just 2 years ago, I used to live in Puchong, in the Malaysian state of Selangor. It was an hour’s drive from the city of Kuala Lumpur but we liked living there because….
(a) it was a relatively new housing area equipped with facilities such as shopping mall (IOI Shopping Centre), a wet market (Pasar Borong Selangor), schools, parks and about 30-minutes drive to KLIA.
(b) If we lived in KL proper, the traveling time would be about the same due to the traffic we would encounter on the way to work
(c) The journey to city centre is ‘breath-taking’ if not interesting (this would be the topic of my part 2 journal)
(d) KL is just not a place to raise a family!

Both my husband and I work in the city – he at (the infamous for traffic jam Golden Triangle) and I at Sentul (famous for curries, trains and Indians…) Here’s a brief on our daily routine every weekday.

We would leave the house at most 7.10am. Any later than that, we would encounter traffic snarls at the Bukit Jalil/Jalan Puchong intersection. This is also the main shopping area for the district where IOI Mall is.

Taking the Sungai Besi highway, we would definitely encounter the traffic jam near the Sg Besi military airport; here, we would spend about 30 – 45minutes of our journey.

Then it would be smooth riding (we would past the King’s Official Residence which is very pretty and nice) till we reach the Sultan Abdul Samad Building where hubby would divert to go into the city centre (going by Central Market towards Jalan Raja Chulan). More traffic here but this is the journey I like best because I get to see the many faces of KL folks – pretty, ugly etc.)



 

At Jalan Raja Chulan, I would give a sigh of relief because I can see his office building (Bangunan Amanah Capital) where I would drop him off in front of the ING Insurance Tower. There, I would proceed alone along Jalan Sultan Ismail towards Jalan Kuching.

Alone in the car, with the other KL drivers, I tend to be rather daring, weaving myself in and out of traffic. UNLESS� I see Our Friend in White� the Patrolman. Then, I would be nice and law-abiding.  

It is normally smooth driving along Jalan Kuching until I join the traffic along Jalan Parlimen. There, in front of PWTC heading towards Jalan Ipoh/Jalan Pahang, there traffic is worst (and MOST INTERSTING). This is also the spot where many of us can get stressed out. I normally take 15-20minutes to get myself out of this traffic until I divert down in front of Grand Pacific Hotel to Jalan Sentul/Jalan Ipoh.

Needing to go to Jalan Sentul where the office is, I would take Jalan Perhentian, thus avoiding the many traffic lights along the short distance between the Jalan Ipoh/Sentul junction and Jalan Kovil Ulu.

The Malaysian AIDS Council office is situated at a relatively new building project AND on the opposite side of the traffic. Worst, the turning for the junction does not have a traffic box and many a motorist just ignore our need to turn into the junction. Thus, this needs more daring antics from us. Like edging our vehicle slowly to force the motorist to stop and give way. But watch out for the motorcyclist! They are the ones who don�t care a dime about their machines nor their life!

By the time I park at my favourite spot and get myself out of the car, it would be 8.15am!

Now that�s what I call a Journey!
 

Amigos Loucos do Football

It is football time again! 


My colleague is football crazy… or should I just say, crazy.

He stays up nearly every night watching the game and he comes to work looking like a zombie. By right, I could send him a nasty memo about his lack of ‘enthusiasm’ and ‘spirit’ at work (just for the heck of it!) but then again, I am such a nice (and understanding) supervisor. So, as long as he gets his job done, I am fine with his state of zombie-ness.

But really!

Aren’t men funny creatures? Who, in the first place, created this funny game where you run after a small circular thingy and then kick if even further once you get hold of it? And why do we need 11 men to do these silly actics?

OK, ok… you (men) have your reasons but why stay up all night just to watch this actions?

Take it from us women…. Just watch the sports section of the evening news and you know the result.

Easy!

PICANTO! PICANTO!

This is my dream car! 

My present car is old; almost 10years old and it is making so much noise at times I wonder if I will ever make it home

On top of it all, the color has run and the engine's making weird sound while the wheels... well, they are still there the last time I checked.

So I am looking around and my eyes have caught sight of the KIA PICANTO.

(sigh!)...methinks PICANTO is real cute. And real convenient.

wanna know about my dream car? try this website...http://www.kia-picanto.com/... its so cold...and fun eventhough there are quite a bit of wait-time to download all those fancy flash.

need i tell more???